Decemystery (2024) 21: A 4channer’s Disturbing VHS Discovery

 

Something I’ve expressed a great deal of interest in doing is covering more stories from 4chan. Primarily cases from the site’s paranormal board, /x/, though I’m open to writing about tales from just about any board if it’s adequately strange enough.

Now, I have a feeling there are more than a few of you who find that idea rather silly. After all, 4chan is notorious for hoaxes and pranks; as such, covering the innumerable Fleshgait, UFO, cryptid, and ghost stories will result in me labeling the case a hoax more often than not.

However, the reason I want to start writing about the stories isn’t because I care about their veracity. Instead, it’s because I think the stories are just outright interesting; I find them creepy, and I’d like to share many of my favorite greentext horror stories with you. They’ve provided me with a lot of enjoyment throughout the years, and I think it could be fun to dedicate write-ups to them.

Last year, I covered a story called “The Screaming Stars,” which—aside from the numerous Conspiracy Iceberg cases that I’ve covered—remains the only greentext story I’ve covered on this blog. For those unaware, greentexts are the stories that utilize the > symbol prior to a sentence.

Now, originally, I’d planned to make Decemystery 2024 the year that I’d begin this trend. I had three stories picked out that I was eager to cover. However, they were all scrapped because I wasn’t confident I could do them justice. In hindsight, I’m sure I could’ve covered one of them and brought it to life in spades, but I digress. There’s always next year.

Despite wiping those three choices from the schedule, I still wanted to cover one spooky story from 4chan. So, I went looking for one. My options were plentiful, but one stood out to me. It’s a case that doesn’t feature anything I mentioned earlier; we’re not going into the realm of the paranormal or supernatural today, dear reader. No, today, we’re tackling something that falls into a rather unique category. It’s a creepy tale that leaves me feeling uncomfortable.

Hailing from /x/, this is a story that I called A 4channer’s Disturbing VHS Discovery. It’s one that I’m pretty sure I heard a great many years ago. And now, at long last, I’ll finally begin what I hope will become a tradition like with the Conspiracy Iceberg. Come along, dear reader; it’s time for us to journey to the Internet’s most infamous image board and see what terrifying tale awaits us in its archives this time!

Decemystery (2024) 20: The Hawaiian Chupacabra

 

“Legendary.”

That’s the first word that comes to mind when I think of El Chupacabra. It’s one of the most widely recognizable cryptids on Earth, having achieved the same level of notoriety as some of the biggest names in cryptozoology (like Sasquatch and The Loch Ness Monster).

Despite that level of fame, the Chupacabra is something that I’ve overlooked for this blog’s entire life. Sure, I’ve brought it up periodically and have discussed it from time to time. However, in the way of it ever being at the forefront of any write-up that I’ve done, that has never happened.

The closest the Chupacabra has ever gotten to being front and center was last year when I talked about “The Mexican Tongue Monster,” but I neglected it because, at the time, the creature in that story didn’t resemble any known depiction of the iconic cryptid that I knew of. Not only that, but the title didn’t even mention the Chupacabra, which I find bizarre in hindsight. Also, this write-up and that one started the same way, with a quote from me. How fitting.

Anyway, there’s a reason I haven’t fixated on the Chupacabra yet. Simply put, I don’t think I can add anything to the story that hasn’t already been said. Like the aforementioned Sasquatch and Loch Ness Monster, there are countless television shows, specials, articles, books, videos, and podcasts that have covered the Chupacabra. What could I say that would be new or exciting?

I’m sure there’s someone out there who would argue that every voice is unique. However, in my eyes, the Chupacabra’s been covered to the point that it now resembles one of its victims. It’s hollow; there’s nothing left inside of it…

Or is there?

The Chupacabra holds a unique distinction. Given the creature’s notoriety around the planet, it’s been blamed for cattle mutilations outside of where the legend spawned from (which was Puerto Rico). Much like a virus, it spread; it was sighted in the Southern United States, Mexico, and much of Latin America, and it was blamed for leaving countless dead farm animals in its wake.

In the decades since then, some believe the Chupacabra has found its way to other continents, with some—be it jokingly or seriously—claiming that if their livestock is killed, it was the work of the vampiric cryptid. Skeptics often dismiss these reports as the work of feral dogs or some other predatory animal.

However, some reports are more enigmatic and not as easily explainable, at least in my eyes. There are countless reports that simply don’t add up in my eyes.

To offer you all an example, I have a friend from New Zealand who lived on a farm. One morning, she and her family found some sheep slaughtered. She’s a trained veterinarian and told me there was no animal that could’ve done whatever did this. The organs had been removed, and the sheep had been burned. Additionally, one had its fetus removed.

Her opinion was that it was either extraterrestrials or the Chupacabra. Honestly? I’m inclined to believe her. I thought that back in 2019 when she first told me the story, and I think that now in 2024.

As graphic and unpleasant as it may be to read that, I brought it up for one very important reason—aside from using it as an example. It was what ultimately motivated me to cover a story about the Chupacabra, so I decided that I’d finally discuss the prolific cryptid on this blog at long last.

However, that motivation would quickly flicker out. Due to mental health struggles and a plethora of other stories that I wanted to cover, covering a case featuring the Chupacabra got put on the back burner for quite some time.

It wasn’t until last year that I finally decided that I’d do it; I’d give the infamous “Goat Sucker” the limelight. Alas, I opted to ax it for reasons that I can’t remember. So, I pushed it up this year, where it became the fourth “purge survivor” when Decemystery 2024’s schedule was shaken up.

However, let’s remain focused. After six years, Limitless Possibilities will finally take a look at one of the most iconic cryptids and legends on Earth; pack your bags and get your passport because today’s Decemystery entry is The Hawaiian Chupacabra, a story that redefines the term “trouble in paradise” in the most mesmerizingly crazy way possible!

Decemystery (2024) 19: An Encounter with the Easter Bunny

 

If there’s one holiday I have virtually no memories of, it’s Easter. Despite being Roman Catholic, it’s a day where I only recall two things: looking for plastic eggs that had money in them (thanks, Grandpa!) and coloring eggs. I thoroughly enjoyed both, but I preferred the former because money meant I could buy toys from vending machines. I was a simple child who has grown into a not-so-simple man.

As for coloring eggs, I enjoyed that, too. It was fun sitting around dipping them into paint and whatnot. Then again, hanging out with my family was always great. It’s too bad the younger me couldn’t appreciate that as much.

Despite those memories, I have no recollection of ever believing in the Easter Bunny. While I’m sure I did, I never thought about him the same way I did Santa Claus or even the Headless Horseman.

Instead, I viewed him as a sign that I should try to pester my mom into buying me a chocolate bunny. I’d say that I would eat it, but I never did because I’m not much of a chocolate person. I think my sister did, though. I can’t remember.

Funnily enough, I think I was later gifted a novelty-sized chocolate bunny. I took one look at it and felt sick. I have no idea if anyone ever finished it. If they did, I pity their stomach.

Anyway, enough background on my. The point I’m making is that my history with Easter isn’t exactly special or fantastical. It’s relatively mundane and par for the course when it comes to a middle-American guy who grew up in a state that would tax breathing if it could.

However, I attribute that monotony to my immediate interest in today’s Decemystery entry. Sure, the title alone is eye-catching, but I’ve always had a fascination with holiday-themed mysteries. They have a little bit of extra flavor that makes them more appealing.

And in the case of today’s story—which I call An Encounter with the Easter Bunny—it has enough flavor to last a lifetime. The idea of meeting a holiday mascot is something I’ve entertained covering before; I’ve come across reports from people who claim they’ve met Santa. However, I’d rather save those stories for a year when I’m actively writing from the start of it and not the middle of the summer.

Still, this sounds like a whimsical time. So, come along; let’s go Easter Egg hunting. I call dibs on the eggs that have money!

Decemystery (2024) 18: One Man’s Conversation with a Cat

 

This write-up is dedicated to a very dear friend of mine. You know who you are!

Once upon a time, I was a bright-eyed, idealistic guy who had dreams and aspirations. Then, the tsunami called “life” came along and washed them all away. This is why I now vehemently dislike idealism and believe that people are better off learning early on that the world’s a rough place and viewed the same way you’d view a lion—terrifying.

Lucky for me, the one thing that the tsunami didn’t sweep away was my optimism. I’ve always maintained a fair amount of it, and I’ve made sure never to lose it. It’s an important piece of my younger self that I cling to for dear life.

That said, for a while, my optimism was really close to evaporating when it came to my writing. The reason for that? Well, when I looked at my family—be they immediate or extended—I often looked at myself and questioned what road I took a detour on.

For context, my family has a history in the military and law (be it law enforcement or lawyering). To call me a black sheep would be quite an understatement; I’m about as far detached from them when it comes to careers and jobs as you can get. Whereas they took up noble occupations, I’m sitting on my bed writing about how people saw a giant spider on the moon.

This, in turn, would make me feel vastly inferior to them. I suppose that’s a given; I’m writing about some of the weirdest stuff I find while combing the Internet. I’m not exactly Robert Kardashian, but I still wished I had more to show for my life than a blog that people visit on occasion.

Lucky for me, in recent times, I’ve come to embrace that black sheep status. My family has supported me, and they love that I’ve pursued a more niche and obtuse path in life than following in the footsteps of everyone else. So, all’s well and good.

Now, what does any of this have to do with today’s story? Well, as we draw ever closer to the end of Decemystery, I want the stories to get weirder; I want them to become so brain-meltingly absurd that you’ll take a look at the title and go, “Oh, Vertigo made this up.” But, deep down, you’ll know I didn’t.

I feel like if I’m going to embrace the topics I’ve fallen in love with, I need to make the second half of this month near-total chaos; I need this Decemystery to end off on a note so crazy that every day will be akin to the wildest roller coaster imaginable! So, to begin that, let’s talk about One Man’s Conversation with a Cat.

Decemystery (2024) 17: The 2023 Beverwijk Alien Abduction

 

When I was 13 years old, I remember going to see a movie. I can’t remember which, but I recall getting a trailer for a film called “The Fourth Kind,” starring Mila Jovovich (who was in those really schlocky Resident Evil movies). She played a psychologist named “Abigal Tyler,” whose patients all claim to see an owl—which I used as the header image for a write-up last year. This, of course, turns out to be incorrect; the “owl” is an extraterrestrial that abducts them.

While I can’t remember what movie I saw the trailer in front of, I recall it scaring me. Yet, I don’t know what caused me to be afraid. I think it was the eerie shot of the owl getting closer to the camera and slowly turning into a Grey alien. Either way, it ended up being seared into my mind. Thanks, Universal Pictures!

Anyway, I didn’t watch the film until 2018—nine years after it was released. As it turns out, film critics aren’t always wrong; sometimes, they hit the nail on the head. The movie wasn’t very good. It was boring, uninteresting, and wasn’t scary.

The movie also had a lot of editing choices that actively made watching the thing awkward, such as one instance where there are four separate shots going on at once: two reenactments and two “archived recordings.” If you don’t know what I’m talking about, go watch an episode of the show “24” and wait for an interlude where the clock is ticking and four scenes of different characters play out on the screen. The movie does that, and it’s horrifically executed.

Anyway, why did I bring this up today? Well, it’s because I’ve never been a believer in alien abductions—I said as much five days ago, and I’ve stated the same thing prior to that. Despite that belief, I find them to be one of the most interesting bits of UFO lore out there. That’s one of the reasons I wanted to watch The Fourth Kind in the first place. It’s also why I ended up watching “Dark Skies,” which you should watch if you want to watch a movie about alien abduction that doesn’t suck. Seriously, I was surprised since I thought the trailer was terrible.

I digress, though. As I was putting Decemystery 2024 back together, it occurred to me that I hadn’t covered a story about alien abduction since 2019—back when I covered the story of Alan Godfrey, a British police officer who claimed he was abducted by aliens. It’s a pretty baffling case that, to this day, I can’t make heads or tales of, and I need to rewrite it.

With the knowledge that I haven’t covered anything related to an alien abduction in half a decade on my mind, I decided that I’d make amends for that by covering not one but two stories related to it. Today’s the first one, and it’s a story dedicated to a Dutch friend of mine. If she happens to dislike this story, I’ll be almost as disappointed as I was when watching The Fourth Kind.

That said, I think it’s about high time we take a trip back to Europe to explore the realm of UFOs and aliens once more. Come along, dear reader; it’s time to examine the tale of The 2023 Beverwijk Alien Abduction.

Decemystery (2024) 16: bubbles.avi

 

Here’s a random fun fact for you, dear reader: This story’s the only one that’s both a “purge survivor” from the original schedule for this month and a part of the five entries I picked from the Conspiracy Iceberg. I thought that was kind of neat.

Anyway, hello, dear reader; welcome back to Decemystery 2024. We’ve hit the halfway point, and I wanted to write about something that was as fun as yesterday’s entry. That was ridiculously easy to do because this story’s been on my radar for a while; I believe it was a part of last year’s Decemystery duology, and I’d considered covering it in 2022. The third time’s the charm, I guess!

If you were to ask me why on God’s green Earth I picked this case out to cover over any other number of Conspiracy Iceberg entries, I wouldn’t be able to answer you. While it’s easier to understand when you hear the claims (yes, claims—there’s more than one version of this), the name doesn’t exactly sound that exhilarating. In fact, it sounds like a really cliché creepypasta—or a plot element to one.

Yet, surprisingly enough, that’s not the case. In fact, the more prevalent version of this conspiracy is beautiful—a word that I don’t think I’ve ever used to describe something without being the slightest bit sardonic. The same can’t be said for the other version, but I digress. Come along, dear reader; let’s take a look at bubbles.avi and see what it’s like when beauty meets brutality!

Decemystery (2024) 15: The Glowing Toe of North Dakota

 

I want to paint a picture for you, dear reader. One of melancholy, “what could have been,” and hopefulness.

After I finished last year’s Decemystery duology, I had three stories picked out for the start of this year. One of them has been on my to-do list since this blog began; I’d been searching high and low for it. I’ve written a portion of the article, but the majority remains incomplete, though I ended up using a section for “The McDonald’s Blob” write-up’s intro and My Take sections.

I never began the other two for two reasons. The first was that my bipolar exited remission. I started experiencing terrible mood swings, ranging from feelings of loneliness and hopelessness to believing that I was invincible.

For the most part, those contrasting emotions were active at the same time in what’s known as a “mixed episode.” For those who don’t know, a mixed episode is when you experience a manic/hypomanic episode and a depressive episode simultaneously. I have type 2 bipolar, so I have hypomania, which isn’t as severe as regular mania.

All of this started in January and didn’t end until mid-August. But, the not-so-ideal circumstances didn’t end there. At the end of the month, my grandmother passed away. She was my last surviving grandparent, and I found myself wishing I’d spent more time with her.

Then I got sick, which was salt in an already degloved-sized wound. If you didn’t know, I hate getting sick—a lot. I contracted some sort of cough while I was in New York for the funeral wake. It wasn’t COVID; that was saved until July.

Suffice it to say the start of my year was a grand disappointment. My plans didn’t come to fruition, my hopes to make 2024 an amazing year for this blog floundered, and I kept blaming myself for not being better in every possible way. I thoroughly believed that it was my fault nothing went right.

Now, as of this writing, I’ve accepted that that isn’t the case. While I could have (and should have) posted an update or two, I felt too ashamed at the time—especially when I couldn’t make any promises for this year’s Decemystery.

But not posting any updates is beside the point. No, the point is that I wanted to cover one of the three stories I planned to start 2024 with. I also wanted it to be one that’d remove the melancholy I’ve come to associate the start of this year with.

That task proved easy since the story I’d begun work on will most likely be the inaugural write-up for Decemystery 2025. Meanwhile, the second story will be covered at some point next year—if all goes well, anyway.

That left me with the third story, the one I’d planned to do at the end of January. It’s another Fortean Map Enigma, and it’s one that I considered covering last year. I forget what it was replaced with, but that’s unimportant. No, what is important is we’re going to retroactively make 2024 feel like a success story by covering a mystery that’s sure to leave you flabbergasted! Come along, dear reader, as we investigate the absolutely bonkers story of The Glowing Toe of North Dakota!