Decemystery (2019) 1: Golf Rumors

I had scrapped the idea for Decemystery 2019 a few weeks ago. I had intended to just offset the workload to March/May so I could get together something extremely special and exciting. Yet, I didn't want to nix what I hope to be a yearly thing. Something that makes the end of the year special and fun 

So I wondered what I could do. It admittedly didn't take long to settle on covering mostly extremely weird, quirky, silly mysteries and a few conspiracies. To top it all off, a few truly horrible, maddeningly evil tales. So while this go around may not have the same vibe as last year—instead featuring primarily outlandish, goofy tales—there is still going to be plenty of fun to be had. This is, of course, merely in my eyes. For all I know, you won't agree.

Anyways, let's get to the first story. This one is the sister entry to the write-up I did in the 2006 Volleyball Incident and is the primary reason I resurrected this year's Decemystery. It's a story that's as vague as it is fascinating. Let me introduce you it to via a description from a now archived 4chan thread.

They also hunt down anyone [people who look into Golf Rumors] religiously.

Such a warning like this is something that would no doubt put off anyone who expresses interest. The story of what’s come to be known as Golf Rumors is one that descends into that oh-so lovely rabbit hole of Satanic rituals and all sorts of other occult-based claims. It’s the type of stuff that makes up any New World Order/Illuminati conspiracy you can find on the internet.

What makes this one more fantastical is how it allegedly has been scrubbed from the surface web. It is, for all intents and purposes, a story that's worthy of being seen by the eyes of those who dare to go to the deepest parts of the deep web.

Or so they say. We won't know unless we go on a journey to discover the truth. So let's begin.

The RMS Conspiracy: The Conspiracy Iceberg

First up, I want to go over something I should have gone over when I covered the 2006 Volleyball Incident. I’ve heard it called the Conspiracy Iceberg and we’ll be going over a total of five of the stories listed on it this month for one reason or another. To view it, just click the link above because the image is way too large to show here without it looking comically large. As for what it is: it’s a listing of various conspiracies. Here are a few examples from each of the tier. Should you not be interested in looking at the image itself. If you aren’t interested in examples, skip to the end of this section.

Tier 1: Crazyhead These are the bread and butter of the conspiracy world and are circulated regularly.

Climate Change Is A Hoax: The United Nations/New World Order fake the warming of Earth to further various agendas. We may one day go over this I should have the time to collect various information on how climate models work among other aspects I deem to be difficult to grasp/write about.

I-70 Killer: An unknown serial killer who’s said to have murdered six or more store clerks between 1992 and 1994. From what I can gather, this serial killer has his conspiracy roots embedded in the idea that I-70 in what’s called “The Mason-Dixon Line”. Here’s what a quick Google search yields about that:

The Mason–Dixon line, also called the Mason and Dixon line or Mason's and Dixon's line, was surveyed between 1763 and 1767 by Charles Mason and Jeremiah Dixon in the resolution of a border dispute involving Maryland, Pennsylvania, and Delaware in Colonial America.

While I cannot confirm that this is exactly what puts the I-70 Killer on the list, I’ve done research into a conspiracy on that puts forth the idea that all serial killers—from Ted Bundy to Jeffrey Dahmer to Ivan Milat—are “programmed to kill” by the United States Central Intelligence Agency (CIA). While I doubt this is the reason and it’s instead rooted more in the Freemasons, that theory is one we’ll go over in the future. For now, I want to state the more or less obvious: get used to seeing the Freemasons mentioned this month. They're tied to quite a few of these stories.

Nostradamus: The “prophecies” put forth by the famous French astrologer and alleged seer are in fact real. This man ties into so many alleged Doomsday prophecies that it’s a wonder how he doesn’t have his own television station.

Tier 2: Deep Researcher These theories are more “edgy” and slightly more obscure. Two of the five entries we’ll be covering also comes from this tier!

Bohemian Grove: Alex Jones did a documentary on this place and part of me has wanted to check it out for the novelty of it. Nevertheless, this place is said to be home to Satanic/Occult rituals among other things. It’s located in Monte Rio, California in the United States and is officially described as “gentlemen’s club” for some of the most influential and prominent men on the planet. It’s off limits to those not a part of it.

MKUltra: The legendary CIA mind control experiment that illegally saw the controversial agency attempt to coerce information out from prisoners via LSD and other psychedelics, some claim the project persists to this day. This comes in the form of mass shooters such as Stephen Paddock, domestic terrorists like Timothy McVeigh, and many other names you see on the evening news every year. If you’re curious to learn more about this, it’s one of the most popular conspiracies. We’ll be going over it next year.

Large Hadron Collider: This device was used to recreate the Big Bang and has since been used for various scientific purposes. There are those who claim that it’s being used to open portals to Hell or alternate dimensions. I can suddenly hear Mick Gordon wheelbarrowing in chainsaws to use as guitars.

Tier 3: Truth Agent Now we’re entering the location where the obscure is the norm and insanity is sanity.

Taured: I wrote about this back in January, so click here if you want to read about the story in full. The abridged version is a man supposedly landed in Japan and claimed to be from a country called Taured. Well, long story short, he was held in a hotel and over night, he vanished without a trace—as did his belongings. Most regard the story as a hoax or urban legend, but some think that the truth was covered up and the so-called “Man From Taured” was a real interdimensional traveler.

Denver Airport: This one I’ll never understand. Denver International Airport, which is located in Denver, Colorado, is supposedly the headquarters for the New World Order/Illuminati. If you look at the paintings that are located within the airport, it is quite “exotic” (per-se). Some also claim that the runways resemble a swastika, though I’ve never quite seen it. I digress though, this theory is extremely popular and the argument has been made that the fact it’d be so obvious and out in the open is why they chose the location. After all, nobody would think to look at an airport.

Though I have to wonder why they wouldn’t pick a more morbid/ironic location like JFK International Airport in New York City.

Missing Children Forest: I think this one is centered on Missing 411, a very popular book series by David Paulides. It posits that the National Forest Service has been covering up various disappearances (primarily children, some of who are found days, weeks, or even months later without so much as a scratch) and strange sightings/occurrences for various reasons. I will one day cover this series in detail, but for now, I suggest checking out videos on YouTube. It’s a very fascinating theory that offers a decent fright if nothing else.

Others however argue that this is based on a mysterious event where a hiker found an enormous amount of missing children posters in a forest. So pick your poison.

Tier 4: Adept of Secrets It’s like middle school, but for conspiracy theories! 

Red Rooms: We’ll actually be covering these in more detail this month. However, they won’t be the primary focus of the entry.

If you’re at all familiar with the Dark Web/Deep Web (pick which name you prefer to call it), you’ve likely heard or seen someone mention Red Rooms. They’re supposedly live streams where you can pay to have someone torture, rape, mutilate, or even murder someone for yours and an audiences pleasure. They’ve been a huge part of Dark Web folklore and have even been featured (to some degree) in film—Unfriended: Dark Web loosely utilized Red Rooms to drive its story. However, are they real? We’ll discuss that later this month, but the conspiracy here states they’re covered up by the government or, even more terrifying, operated by Satanic/Occult members of the New World Order/Illuminati.

SCPs Based on Real Life: The SCP (Secure, Contain, Protect) Foundation can see its roots traced back to 4chan. An extremely popular piece of internet culture, the Foundation prides itself on having its content come from its users and fans. However, there are those that believe the horrors featured on the website are actually allusions to real life terrors that are contained by a real life secret Foundation. Nothing else to really say. I guess if you ever wanted to be an SCP employee, you better hope this theory is real!

North Korea Utopia: The idea here is that North Korea is actually all it claims to be—paradise on Earth—and the NWO/Illuminati have fabricated what we hear and read about North Korea. This includes Kim Jong-Un not being who we’re told he is. There are a few variants to this theory, such as Un being threatened if he doesn’t make his various threats and his nuclear arsenal being planted by Barack Obama’s administration. It’s a very weird theory that takes many different forms and has a following, albeit one that’s somewhat niche.

Tier 5: Animaster Congratulations, you’ve graduated from middle school and are now in your first year of Conspiracy High School. 

24 Hour Year: This theory was a bit difficult to find information on. From what I gathered—which is extremely little—the CIA created a hallucinogenic drug that made a second feel like 24 hours. They've used this on spies, terrorists, and time travelers.

The reason I say it was difficult is because if  you were to Google “24 Hour Year Conspiracy Theory” as I initially did, you’ll be met with Gene Ray’s Time Cube. Some think this entire theory is merely a reference to the Time Cube and if it is, I’ll take some of that hallucinogenic drug to escape it. That was a blast from the past I didn’t need to experience.

Google Earth Black Spots: If you’ve ever read or watched any top 10 lists, then it’s extremely likely you’ve heard of this theory. For those unfamiliar, there are certain areas on Google Earth that are blotted out by black spots—just as the theory’s name states. The reason for these black spots has typically been blamed on camera glitches or other technological malfunctions/errors. Some think otherwise though, claiming that the black spots are hiding UFO bases or other secret government facilities that house secretive vehicles or weapons. Perhaps one day, we’ll go over this and get to the bottom of it. For now, we’re left with wondering what Google doesn’t want us to see.

John Titor Project: John Titor is an extremely famous internet legend that I intend on covering next year. For those unfamiliar with him, he was a supposed time traveler who was sent back to retrieve an old computer piece for something related to the future. After retrieving it, he defied orders not to tell of anything and went to hold was could best be described as an Ask Me Anything session before they were commonplace.

Titor answered a few questions and even showed blueprints to what his time machine looked like. He also made a few predictions, such as when World War III would occur, that ultimately didn’t come true. However, he mentioned how his future may not be our future, which to some served as a “Get Out of Jail Free” card if his predictions were proven to be bunk.

While the identity of who John Titor really was is unknown, a man by the name of Joseph Matheny—who created the ARG “Ong’s Hat”—claimed in 2018 that he had worked with some people as a consultant in creating the character of Titor. According to Matheny:

“[Titor] is a story that was created as a literary experiment by people who were observing what I was doing with Ong's Hat and these people wanted to do something like that. I was a consultant on the project, [but] it wasn't my project.”

This claim has ultimately been the generally agreed upon answer to the mysterious John Titor. However, there are those that disagree and believe Titor was in fact the real deal. Some have even gone so far as to say that US President Donald Trump is John Titor. The basis for this comes from his paternal uncle, John Trump, having been an extremely well known physicist who reviewed and analyzed some of Nikola Tesla’s papers.

As for Titor himself, whether or not he was real or the product of an ARG doesn’t matter. His story has lived on as one of the internet’s most enduring legends and has inspired numerous other supposed time travelers to hold Q&A sessions on internet message boards.

Tier 6: Transcended The second year of Conspiracy High School. The other two entries are from this tier!

Michigan Blue Hell: This is one that I had to get information about from a podcast called Dead Rabbit Radio. The show—hosted by Jason Carpenter—is definitely worth your time if you're into the paranormal, supernatural, and/or conspiracies. I'll be citing the podcast for three of the Conspiracy Iceberg entries (one of which is Golf Rumors) as it's the only place I was able to find information on them.

Michigan Blue Hell is a very interesting theory that brings to mind the claims that we're in the matrix. The name derives from the endless void in video games—which is the skybox you see when you look up to, well, the sky—that you can fall into should clip out of the game's terrain.

The idea of this theory is that there's a building in Michigan that can “clip out” of our reality. Some claim this is caused by a Native American spirit that was imprisoned on the land however. No matter which version you believe, the conspiracy remains the same at its core and the end result is generally the same. If you fall into the Michigan Blue Hell, you'll never return.

Life on the Sun: This theory is something I want to one day go over in more detail as it relates to a lot of other stories that involve the Sun. However, for the time being, let me try to abridge this monstrous story.

William Herschel, the man who discovered Uranus back in 1795, originally believed that there was life on the Sun, the massive body of plasma, gas, and other energies that burns at 9940.73 degrees Fahrenheit (5504.85 Celsius). This concept is widely disregarded as being hogwash and nonsense, but I’m inclined to believe it ties into the concept that our Sun is being used by extraterrestrials to refuel their vehicles and other machines in their home star systems/galaxies. One example of this is Tabby’s Star, which was seemingly blocked by an “alien megastructure”. Some think it’s gigantic solar panels.

This is merely my own speculation though. For all I know, it’s just as it advertises on the tin and it just posits that there’s life on the Sun. Pick your plasmatic celestial body.

Iraq Stargates: The theory here posits that the real reason for the invasion of Iraq was because Saddam Hussein had stargates. These stargates—which allow one to travel vast distances in an instant—were supposedly gifted to the Sumerians millennia ago by the Anunnaki (their Gods, which some think were in fact aliens). As such, it was these stargates—one of which was supposedly in the basement of Saddam Hussein’s palace—that the United States invaded Iraq back in 2003, rather than oil.

This theory is stupendously popular—likely being up there with 9/11 trutherism. Why it’s listed in Tier 6 is beyond me. Given the Middle East is a hotbed for ancient alien theories, one would think that there’d be theories surrounding Middle Eastern dictators having alien artifacts and technologies in their possession. One has to wonder why Saddam didn’t use the stargate to his advantage though.

Tier 7: Interdimensional Monk Year three of Conspiracy High School. Have you gotten a conspiratorial girlfriend? Also, this tier is where the 2006 Volleyball Incident originated from.

The Simpsons is Real Footage: The Simpsons has a weird history with conspiracy theories. There are those who posit that it’s the central hub for what’s known as “predictive programming”. Basically, it’s the act of foretelling an event on television or in a film before it happens as a way of mocking the viewer for being a sheep. That’s my understanding of it anyways.

This theory takes it a step further however by stating that the show is in fact real and that a town was the sight of a nuclear disaster that turned everyone yellow. It also split the fabric of reality and now they’re two-dimensional beings. This was done to cover up the disaster; Fox sent a camera crew to the sight and filmed the adventures of the Simpson family and as a result, The Simpsons was born.

This theory is generally accepted as a joke—having originated from a site that I’m unable to find, but was supposedly very wordy and lengthy. However, that doesn’t stop some from accepting it as fact. Do keep this theory in mind as we go along though, it’ll be relevant later.

The Rapture Already Happened: The Rapture is a supposed event that will take place during the End of Days where all of those saved by accepting Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior will be ascended into Heaven; body and soul as opposed to merely soul. At least, that’s my understanding of it. The actual scriptural legitimacy to the Rapture is heavily contested. Some believe it to be legitimate while others believe it to have no basis in Christian theology.

Whatever your views of it are, this theory posits that the Rapture happened some time ago and it was never recorded by any historians. As such, we’re living in the End Days and we just don’t know it since the Rapture happened some undisclosed period of time ago. Should this actually be the case, there are those that state the Rapture would precede the Great Tribulation. So make of that what you will.

The Earth is Bigger Than the Sun: Some claim the Earth is flat. Others claim the Earth is hollow. Then there are those that claim the Earth is larger than the Sun. This likely has to do with how the Sun is so large, yet appears to be rather small in the sky. However, I can’t say for certain if that’s the case since I couldn’t find a single piece of information on this theory. Perhaps NASA’s covering it up.

Tier 8: Reality Hacker The final year of Conspiracy High School. This joke may be the most cringey thing I’ve ever done.

90% Of Books Are Written By One Person: Don’t judge a book by it’s cover, the author’s gotten really tired of commissioning good book covers.

This theory is one I could find next to no information on, but I’m going to hazard a guess and say the name says it all. As for who the author is, I hope it isn’t Shakespeare. My joking aside, keep this theory in mind, just like the one with The Simpsons.

The Lottery Exists to Capture Time Travelers: If ever there was an idea that desperately needed to be made into a movie or short film, it’d be this theory right here. The idea is as it advertises on the tin. The lottery isn’t a game of chance, but is rather meant to be unwinnable. That is, unless you’re a time traveler who knows that weeks winning numbers. Perhaps that’s why states tax the winnings into oblivion.

Aliens Caused the Bubonic Plague: This theory is actually fairly popular among some people and has am odd basis in reality thanks to reports of cigar-shaped UFOs releasing “smoke” and “gas”. As the name suggests, the theory is that aliens were responsible for the devastating Bubonic Plague (sometimes called the Black Death)that wiped out 30–60% of Europe's population. Whether or not this was done with malicious intent or by complete accident is contested as there are those who view aliens as benevolent and others that see them as intergalactic warlords. So pick your poison when examining this theory.

Tier 9: Man of the World You’re now ready for the world of Conspiracy. Congratulations! This is also the tier that Golf Rumors is a part of.

Solar Plexus Clown Gliders: This one was originally a part of this month, but I changed it at the very last minute. I wasn’t even aware that it was on the iceberg until I was writing this portion of the blog. While I’d love to go over the entire thing, it’s lengthy and very bizarre. As such, I’ll be giving the briefest and most concise version possible.

“Basically the idea is that the words themselves (Solar plexus clown glider) triggers a response in the brain. If you meditate on these words or think them or write them or say them over and over, you will start to see these things.”

That description I grabbed from an archived 4chan thread. Anyways, the SPCG (as I’ll call it from here on out) is that there is an evil entity that corrupts you via the “Solar Plexus” chakra in your body. When it does, you begin to see and experience things thanks to its corruptive nature. This will in turn drive you mad. The origin of this theory is rooted in a creepypasta-esque manner, having been circulated via email early in the 1990s, though some say it dates back to the 1980s. This would make it one of the earliest chain letters that I'm aware of.

Yet, unlike other chain letters that say you'll die from some long haired ghost girl who wants everyone to suffer like her, the SPCG has some legitimacy—or as much as something like it can have. This is thanks to the alleged sightings and experiences people have had with it. In order to fully understand it however, we'd have to go over the various chakras of the human soul and other aspects. For now, the best way to describe this entity is that it's a demon. One that, supposedly, has been covered up thanks to the suppression of humanity's chakras.

Vaccines Steal Souls: When your Anti-Vaxxer reaches Level 35, it evolves into this theory. The idea is that the vaccinations you and/or your child receive  siphon your soul out of the body. This is done for an array of reasons that vary depending on what you believe the NWO/Illuminati are plotting to do. No matter what, it makes you a soulless drone for the Antichrist.

Endless Elevators: The idea here is related to something called The Elevator Game. It’s said that if you hit the buttons while in an elevator in a certain order, you’ll be sent to an alternate dimension or reality. However, others say that it’s related to buildings where the elevator goes far lower than normal and that there are things built beneath the Earth that aren’t meant to be seen by the everyman. We may go over the former of these two in the very near future. Perhaps Steven Tyler can join and sing about love in an elevator.

Tier 0: The Rebirth You’ve made it to the big leagues, kid.

Bank of Souls: Less a conspiracy theory and more a simple theory in the nature of human souls, the idea behind the Bank of Souls is there's a finite number of souls in the universe. The concept comes from a tree that produces souls the same a fruit tree produces fruit.

In this particular case, the tree is Guf—the Jewish treasury where souls are kept. When the treasury—or in this case, bank—runs out of souls, the world will cease to exist and we'll all move onto the afterlife.

Real Humans Died Out Millennia Ago: This theory is simple and ties into the idea that our ancestors were significantly more advanced than we believed them to be and we are but a remnant of that. The idea also posits that the most advanced of them were giants—something that we will hopefully cover in the next few months—that stood somewhere between 8 and 11+ feet tall. As for when this real human society was around, the general claim is that it was somewhere around 10,000 years ago, but some have put it at as little as 8,000 years.

As for what happened, we—the more primal species—hunted these giants to extinction. However, there are claims that they were driven into hiding or underground. This is where the theory will branch off and raise several different ideas as to what is the truth, but that’s a story for another day.

God’s Ego Death: There’s a second theory on the Conspiracy Iceberg that’s related to God. It’s called “God’s Last Wish” and I’ve seen some pair it up with God’s Ego Death. However, I have no idea as to whether or not they’re related in any way, shape, or form.

Whatever the case may be, God’s Ego Death refers to God—generally of every theological representation—having an “Ego Death”. What that is is when one loses their subjective self-identity. In other words, God would want to cease being God. As for why, there are a few differing views on the exact reason, but the general consensus is that God has stopped loving humanity and has instead come to hate us. As such, he wishes for us to die so he can try again. However, we are a stubborn lot and do not wish to simply die. Rather, we persist through trial after trial, tribulation after tribulation, until we succeed.

There are, however, others who claim something different. That version is that God is a collective delusion that has been created by humanity; a sort of manifestation of the desire for there to be a higher power in this world. As such, God was sort of willed into existence by this collective belief. Through this, God now believes himself to be a real entity and the day that he realizes he isn’t, the universe will cease to exist.

If you’re religious, both theories are likely the ultimate horror story for you. Though both may also seem quite ridiculous. Either way, we may one day go over them in greater detail.

For now, our demonstration as to what the Conspiracy Iceberg is done. I presented these examples to give an idea as to what exactly Golf Rumors is. Although anyone can label something a conspiracy, I believe there's more to them than just a crazy person who doesn't agree with the official report to something. As I've shown above, conspiracies exist in many forms across a variety of topics. They also have offshoots that can become their own entity. Golf Rumors is one such case.

One other reason is that I believe it's essential that we understand we aren't dealing with something “normal”. Golf Rumors is something that's both highly obscure, yet has its roots firmly embedded within the realm of something very well known. Though as you'll see, those roots quickly vanish the further you get into the theory. 

With that said, let's finally take a gander at this theory and figure out what the truth is to Golf Rumors.

Par for the Pentagram: The Story of the Golf Rumors

According to posts on websites like 4chan and Reddit along with Dead Rabbit Radio: during the 2009 PGA tournament—which was held in August of that year—a nameless, female Politico journalist attended an after party. Upon going into the basement of where this after party was held, she discovered occult activity that was extremely disturbing in nature as opposed to the “normal LARPing Satanist wannabes”. Understandably terrified and put off by what she saw, she wrote about the event and posted it to Politico, only for the story to immediately be removed. Supposedly, the powers that be were none too pleased by her exposing their shady activities and likely threatened her with severe punishment—probably an “unfortunate accident”.

Although the story was removed, it’s claimed that some people did read the story and online forums centered around golf ended up discussing the story en masse. In reaction to this, the posts were wiped off the internet and no archives exist to this day. Still unnerved by the amount of attention that this story was receiving, Tiger Woods’ sex scandal ended up occuring mere days after these posts were removed (I think, the wording of the post I’m citing this portion off of is extremely vague). Said post goes on to state that Tiger Woods ruined his image to bury the Satanic activity story.

The post ends by stating that the poster knew of a .onion site (a website that’s only accessible via the Tor browser), but they couldn’t find it. They also claim that “all surface web traces of it [Golf Rumors] have been wiped out side of threads like this”. As I stated at the start, I didn’t dig around on Tor, but that doesn’t seem to matter since the story of Golf Rumors itself expands out into other conspiracies that we’ll touch upon in a bit.

Anyways, that’s the most common version of the story I’ve seen, but there’s a slightly longer one I came across that has a few additional details that create a clearer and more disturbing image. Said additional details are as follows.

1: What the journalist saw was that there was a Satanic ritual going on involving children who’d been trafficked there.

2: The story was taken down by editors and higher ups at Politico. As for the golf forums that began to discuss the story, they were shutdown and the threads were wiped from the internet.

3: The journalist ended up dying under suspicious circumstances. Some people began to look into the story, but this was overshadowed entirely after Tiger Woods’ scandal became public. There’s nothing about Woods doing on his own volition.

These three details help to clear up some of the odd wording in the original version, though whether or not they’re considered “canon” is up for debate. The post that these details came from does expand upon it though, starting off with a link to a YouTube video where two military veterans are exploring an old camp. You can click here if you wish to watch it. If not, the title is, “Child Trafficking Camp Found in Arizona by Veterans on Patrol”. If we go by what the post said, the abridged version of events is that the men found the camp—said to be abandoned—within a city that has a Rothschild governor. If you don’t know who the Rothschild’s are, they’re an extraordinarily rich family that are said to have influence within the world’s governments via Central Banking and other means. They’re also said to be the puppetmasters of people like George Soros. It’s an extremely long story that we may someday go over if I get the time to look into their family history as it goes back a long time and involves an absurdly large number of conspiracies that would require a long time to cover in a way that would meet the nonpartisan standards I do my best to maintain.

Moving on though, the post states that the camp contained children’s toys, condoms, hair dye stains, and makeup. The men called the police and upon arriving, they arrested the men. Naturally pissed by this, the men decided to dig in deeper and discovered that CEMEX—a multinational building company based out of Mexico—were the owners of the land.

With this new found knowledge, the men decide to arm themselves and return to the location, now livestreaming what they find. While there, a man—described as a “gangster thug”—appears, masquerading as a law enforcement officer. He threatens them with “lethal force” should they not leave, but quickly realizes that he’s outmanned and outgunned. Defeated, he leaves and the findings end up going viral. As for the aforementioned CEMEX, others began to look into them and discovered that they own a considerable amount of land next to or nearby golf courses. This led some to connect this all to Golf Rumors.

All of this presents a remarkably unusual image; golf is probably the last sport I’d ever expect to be tied into a story involving Satanic and Occult activities. I guess that’s my fault for assuming anything in this world could still be purely innocent in nature. As a final twist of the knife, as I was writing this and searching through some 4chan threads, I did encounter one that led some to connect the concept of Golf Rumors to more than just child trafficking for Satanic rituals. The idea extended into a quote from Stephen Paddock’s brother; Stephen having been the man behind the 2017 Las Vegas shooting. His brother was quoted as saying that he’d spend days playing golf with him. To some, this was a hint that Paddock was a sleeper agent of sorts and that golf was the trigger for him to carry out the shooting.

This post adds a few other branches to Golf Rumors that include the world’s elites meeting on golf courses or within the clubs that are often on golf courses. This one is actually true as golf is a sport where people will often discuss business and/or make deals. The simplistic nature of the game allows for two or more people to speak, be it casually or otherwise, without needing to keep their complete and total focus on the game at hand. There are other aspects, but this has always been my understanding.

The second branch is that there are secret tunnel networks beneath the courses themselves; these tunnels leading to rooms meant for Satanic rituals are other illicit and grisly occult-based activities. This ties into the third branch, which involves the sacrificing of children and demons outright being in contact with the aforementioned elite and even world leaders.

The final thing I’ll mention is something that one 4chan user posted, which has to be one of the most fantastical things I’ve ever read and will ever cite on this blog. They state that the children are being sacrificed to the Biblical figure known as the Abomination of Desolation; the figure appearing in the final book, Revelation. The poster went on to state that the Satanists were keeping parts of the children or parts of the Abomination itself—the wording is really unclear to me. Here’s the line below, tell me if you can make sense of it.

They actually keep parts to the abomination of desolation

The poster goes on to state that, of the 1.6 million people a year who end up vanishing, they’re all sacrificed to the Abomination of Desolation. It’s because of this very reason that whenever Golf Rumors is spoken of, it’s always made out to be one of the most warped, vile and heinous things in the world. Whatever despicable thing that could be done in the eyes of anyone with a good moral compass is done.

The poster ends off by stating that those involved in these acts will religious hunt down anyone who knows of this and continues to look into it. As such, those who continue to look into Golf Rumors should likely treat it in the same vein of The Most Dangerous Game, only everyone chasing them has a Driver club in one hand and a carving knife in the other.

With that though, the story to Golf Rumors concludes. As a whole, the theory is one that branches off two larger conspiracies. The first is PizzaGate, which I’m sure most people have heard of or at least seen the name to. It’s the claim that the world’s elite are in some way tied to or directly are pedophiles while the other is more centered around the idea that Satanism is the religion of choice for the world’s elite. Both of those theories cross paths at times and some may say they’re one in the same. Either way, Golf Rumors has its roots in both.

However, while that may be the end of the story of Golf Rumors itself, it isn’t the end of the conspiracy as a whole. There’s one detail I left out since it isn’t completely tied to Golf Rumors. Though I think it’s still worth mentioning so you can judge for yourself.

Knowing Too Much: Was Erica Blasberg Murdered?

Erica Blasberg was 25-years-old when she died. A plastic bag over head and an overdose of various prescription drugs in her system. The death was ruled a suicide, something Blasberg had repeatedly attempted in the months leading up to her death. While a suicide note wasn’t at the crime scene, it was discovered that Blasberg’s doctor—a one Dr. Hess—had removed the suicide note and her prescription medication from the scene in order to “spare the family embarrassment”. Hess ended up pleading guilty to misdemeanor obstruction and was given one year’s probation and 40 hours of community service.

As for why Blasberg—who was a member of the LPGA and had aspirations to make it big as a golfer—ended her life, the explanation is rather simple. Her career wasn’t going as she’d planned. As a person with few friends out in Nevada (where she’d moved in hopes of making it big) and with her life on what she saw as being the downswing, she ended up taking her own life. To do this—and I’m loosely quoting Dead Rabbit Radio on this and just like the show said: I’m not at all endorsing this whatsoever—Blasberg overdosed on the prescription drugs and asphyxiated herself to make sure that there was no chance of resuscitation. If she had her stomach pumped, they wouldn’t be able to solve the asphyxiation. If they performed CPR, she was OD on said drugs.

However, this explanation still doesn’t ring true to some skeptics, who believe she was the witness of something far more sinister. Whether or not this is true is something that’s generally written off as crazy talk. Blasberg’s father insists her daughter was murdered however. Perhaps she was. Perhaps she wasn’t. Either way, there are those that ties Blasberg into the story of Golf Rumors, though the two aren’t always tied together.

Normally, that would be the end of the story as a whole. It isn’t though as some think there’s something much bigger to Golf Rumors. Something much, much more secretive. With that in mind, let’s jump from Satanism to the CIA.

Alakazam: The Story of Robert Golf

The bland nature of Golf Rumors led some people to believe that it was a mask for something much bigger than what it presented itself as. A terrible truth that covered for an even more terrible truth. This even more terrible truth turned out to be the story of a man named Robert Golf—a renowned psychic/scientist from the 1980s who was involved with CIA experiments.

I cannot find a consistent statement on whether or not Robert Golf—who is sometimes called Richard Golf—is a psychic or a scientist. The post that claims he was a scientist though has some of the funniest theories related to a conspiracy theory that involves Satanic ongoings—similar in fashion to the one’s from the regular Golf Rumors post I cited earlier. Let’s go over them for fun.

The first is that it involves tunnels under golf courses that, rather than leading to Satanic ritualistic chambers, The post ends off with a similar outlier portion that lists a few of them; I will now list them as they’re some of the funniest things I’ve ever seen in relation instead manipulate the events of golf games via magnets “like in Space Jam”. You know, that film with Michael Jordan and Bugs Bunny.

The second outlier states that Golf Rumors refers to a lost level in a Grand Theft Auto game. I have no idea where anyone got this idea from, but I’m going to imagine that this is all a secret marketing tactic by Sam and Dan Houser until they reveal Grand Theft Auto VI.

The third is that Golf Rumors should really be Gulf Rumors—something that I actually thought of repeatedly while researching this and even as I wrote this entire entry—and that it refers to a secret naval battle. Whether this is the Gulf of Mexico in some sort of Battle of Los Angeles style event or the Persian Gulf War, I don’t know.

The fourth and final outlier is that Golf Rumors is a “memetic virus which infects all those who think about it”. I’ll very quickly cover this since the post contains a portion that explains it and it ties into Solar Plexus Clown Gliders—that conspiracy that I briefly discussed at the start.

The idea of a memetic virus is something of an insidious being that comes to be when you think or speak about the conspiracy. I’d compare it to some sort of offshoot of the Mandela Effect that has to do with the falsification of memories, but my understanding to this entire thing could be wildly off and I’m spouting nonsense. 

Now then, the Glass Camera was supposedly a joint project carried out by the CIA and FBI during the 1990s. The intention was to make completely undetectable surveillance tools that had both a camera and a microphone. This should, in our current understanding of physics, be impossible (side note: that isn’t me saying it, it’s the 4chan post; click here if you want proof since I know precisely nothing about physics). Should the so-called Glass Camera be possible, you would need something that could absorb the light to record it and make said absorption of light to make it visible.

Apparently undeterred by these impossibilities, the CIA utilized their knowledge of remote viewing and physical projection to, “train humans to not only remotely perceive a subject, but also project this information to a camera with the person to create an objective recording of the event”. However, this projection—this camera—doesn’t simply record something. Rather, it’s an “integral part of the viewing technique” which, “allows the viewer to channel their focus and view images to a much greater degree than through traditional remote viewing means”.

This incredible feat came with a price however. According to the poster, the sheer psychic energy that was required to achieve this monumental goal put an incredible amount of strain on the viewer’s body. This, in turn, almost always resulted in death after “chronic viewing experience”. Not only did the viewer end up dying though, but remote viewing of whatever was projected was known to cause “increasing mental degradation” along with dissociative disorders in the viewer. As such, it’s believed that those who were involved in the Glass Camera operations were in reality abducted by the CIA and forced to be participants. That, or they were lied to about what the true nature of the operation was—or had the risks downplayed heavily.

One of these suspected victims was a man by the name of Robert Golf. Described as a somewhat prominent psychic from the 1980s, Golf allegedly disappeared overnight and despite his supposed prominence, there’s no trace of him in any books and there are no records of him today. Because of this, rumors and speculation as to Golf’s ultimate fate sprang out; one of the most popular ones being that he was abducted by the US government and forced to partake in their various psyops—one of which was Glass Camera.

With that: the story of Robert Golf is one that has been contested a fair bit by the conspiracy community. Some believe it to be the real version of Golf Rumors while others believe that it’s a disinformation campaign by the New World Order and Satanists to throw truth seekers off their trail. I will concede that I’ve never seen two varying stories like this emerge for a conspiracy such as Golf Rumors in the manner it did. However, there is a theory for this and it’s one that could explain why. Before we get to that explanation however, let’s move onto the third and final form of Golf Rumors, which is perhaps the least insane of them all.

The Only Dream I Ever Have; The Surface of the Sun: The Story of G.O.L.F. Rumors

This was a theory put forth by Dead Rabbit Radio—though I think it might’ve been more of a joke than anything else. I digress though. Carpenter mentioned towards the end that Golf Rumors may not have to do with the sport, but rather with the “Global Oscillations at Low Frequencies” part of the Solar and Heliospheric Observatory (SOHO) spacecraft. The G.O.L.F. aspect monitors the sun and has revealed some very interesting things about it, such as how the Sun’s core spins four times faster than the Sun itself.

According to Carpenter, this might’ve been what Golf Rumors is really about. Perhaps there are rumors that there’s something amiss with the Sun that we don’t know since it’s being covered up. Perhaps there’s something sinister, terrifying, or concerning about the Sun. Perhaps there truly is life on the Sun. Perhaps the Sun will die far sooner than we expected it would. Or perhaps the Sun is a living creature.

Now granted, the “official” story of Golf Rumors doesn’t at one point mention the Sun. One could argue that that’s because what we’re seeing is a disinformation campaign on the part of NASA or the government as a whole. It’s ultimately up to you to decide, but I think that if nothing else, this adds an interesting layer to what’s already a very bizarre story with two wildly different versions to it. With that said though, the story of Golf Rumors is done, so let’s move onto the theories.

Theories

1. The rumors are legitimate

This theory is as it states on the tin, box, and DVD cover. The Golf Rumors are true and as such, there’s a major Satanic ring utilizing golf courses for illicit operations. No more, no less.

In the way of evidence, this theory doesn’t have much. It’s one of those theories that relies upon the belief that the world’s elite are a part of a global, sinister conspiracy to ruin the little man. As such, if you don’t already believe in theories like Golf Rumors, the odds that this one will sway your opinion is next to none. If anything, it’ll merely reinforce your belief that conspiracy theorists belong in mental institutions.

2. The version with Robert Golf is the real one

Our second theory is that the version featuring the so-called Robert Golf is the real version. I couldn’t find any evidence to back this up, but there are a few out there who think it’s legitimate, so I believe it’s worth at least acknowledging.

The main argument that one can give for this one is that the CIA has a history of being extremely secretive with what it has at its disposal and is good at making people both disappear and appear to have killed themselves. As such, it only stands to reason that they could do the same with Robert Golf. I leave that up to you to decide.

Also, as a little fun tidbit: there are those that believe the Glass Camera was indeed real and nowadays we refer to it as a smartphone.

3. It has to do with G.O.L.F.

This theory posits that Dead Rabbit Radio was in fact right in speculating that the truth is that there is something fishy going on with the Sun. Personally, I don’t believe it as I think it’s a bit too much of a stretch in the way of connecting the names, though I could also say that about Robert Golf.

Now granted, of the three versions, this is probably the most “realistic”, but that’s being generous. The Sun is a mysterious object that has many secrets still held close to its rapidly spinning core, but the vagueness of what those secrets (and likewise, rumors) could be makes it very difficult for me to believe. Nevertheless, there are those who may take this possibility more seriously, so have at it.

4. It’s all fake

If you’re someone who scoffs at the notion of conspiracy theories, then odds are this is where you fall. This theory posits that the entire story is merely hogwash and the ravings of those who are crazy. Nothing more, nothing less.

This theory also technically lacks evidence given there’s been no investigation into the so-called Golf Rumors. However, given there aren’t mass disappearances on golf courses every year involving children, one can reasonably cite that as evidence to disprove said rumors.

5. It’s an elaborate troll that’s meant to mess with conspiracy theorists

This theory is very similar to the previous one, but runs deeper in the way of how it operates.

You see, the truth of the matter is, some of those examples I gave at the start were made up by whoever made the Conspiracy Iceberg in an attempt to fool those who’d read it and go on a wild goose chase to find out what they are. Those that I couldn’t find much information on are likely a part of that, but that could simply be me not looking hard enough through /x/ archives.

Golf Rumors is one of those stories that fell into that category—supposedly. It was apparently made up to get the board riled up and searching for clues to whatever the “rumors” were. As a result, the story that I presented was created. Case closed, right? To some, no. There are those who are adamant that the rumors are legitimate and not at all made up. Most would likely argue that this is in the vein of something like PizzaGate, but let’s not go down that rabbit hole yet.

My Take

Much in the same way that The Simpsons is allegedly a reality television program, I’m inclined to believe that the so-called “Golf Rumors” are nothing more than a troll that was successful in what it set out to do: mess with conspiracy theorists. While I can accept that there are no doubt some weird people in the world of sports who have done either illicit or just downright peculiar things, Golf Rumors is too vague in its wording to present anything that can sway me into believing that it is in anyway real.

It, along with some of the theories I gave examples above, simply doesn’t have enough to it to back up what it purports. If we look at the theory that 90% of all books are from one author, we can’t find anything. Googling it yields nothing and while one can argue that Google rigged the search results, there’s normally something that would sneak its way onto the first page of results.

Now does that outright debunk this theory? No, technically not. Taking the world of anonymous users on the internet is something that one has to do with a very large grain of salt. It could be a troll in of itself and the story is actually legitimate. However, until some hard proof is presented, I’m inclined to believe that this story is nonsense.

Now as for the CEMEX stuff, it’s possible that stuff was planted there by the men in the video. However, it’s also possible that was legitimate. Child trafficking is a very real thing that I think isn’t given as much attention as it should be. It’s something I think that is often overlooked for one reason or another, whether that be people not wanting to believe it exists or simple ignorance. However, I don’t believe correlation of one company equals the entire theory being legitimate. Sorry, but that’s just me.

As for the death of Erica Blasberg, I agree with Dead Rabbit Radio. I think she committed suicide and did so in a manner that prevented any successful resuscitation.

Now as for the other two versions: I echo my sentiments above to them too.

Conclusion

The world of conspiracy theories is more expansive and amazing than I originally thought. What I once saw as limited to truther movements driven by those who don't trust authority and the powers that be I now see to be  a world that runs much deeper.

The theories of medicine stealing souls, aliens being hunted down by humans, humanity originating from Mars, and humanity being far older than we could've ever imagined. These theories originate from a world that is as paranoid as it is fantastic. One where danger is as real as the concept of trust among anyone who isn't like-minded.

It's terrifying, yet amazing. The functionality of this mindset is something I've never seen before. It's like staring into the abyss, but it's nervous about my presence.

However, the deeper one goes, the more unnerving it becomes. Theories of illicit and vile trades and black markets for items that I cannot imagine become the norm. Proposed theories that reality is all based upon a collective delusion of a higher power that will one day cease to exist because we'll learn the truth.

The further the insanity grows, the more I can't help but stare on as I watch people debate over what is real and what is fabricated to mess with them. It's schizophrenic in nature, yet it all comes together to form a world that I find enrapturing.

It's maddeningly beautiful.