Decemystery (2024) 19: An Encounter with the Easter Bunny

 

If there’s one holiday I have virtually no memories of, it’s Easter. Despite being Roman Catholic, it’s a day where I only recall two things: looking for plastic eggs that had money in them (thanks, Grandpa!) and coloring eggs. I thoroughly enjoyed both, but I preferred the former because money meant I could buy toys from vending machines. I was a simple child who has grown into a not-so-simple man.

As for coloring eggs, I enjoyed that, too. It was fun sitting around dipping them into paint and whatnot. Then again, hanging out with my family was always great. It’s too bad the younger me couldn’t appreciate that as much.

Despite those memories, I have no recollection of ever believing in the Easter Bunny. While I’m sure I did, I never thought about him the same way I did Santa Claus or even the Headless Horseman.

Instead, I viewed him as a sign that I should try to pester my mom into buying me a chocolate bunny. I’d say that I would eat it, but I never did because I’m not much of a chocolate person. I think my sister did, though. I can’t remember.

Funnily enough, I think I was later gifted a novelty-sized chocolate bunny. I took one look at it and felt sick. I have no idea if anyone ever finished it. If they did, I pity their stomach.

Anyway, enough background on my. The point I’m making is that my history with Easter isn’t exactly special or fantastical. It’s relatively mundane and par for the course when it comes to a middle-American guy who grew up in a state that would tax breathing if it could.

However, I attribute that monotony to my immediate interest in today’s Decemystery entry. Sure, the title alone is eye-catching, but I’ve always had a fascination with holiday-themed mysteries. They have a little bit of extra flavor that makes them more appealing.

And in the case of today’s story—which I call An Encounter with the Easter Bunny—it has enough flavor to last a lifetime. The idea of meeting a holiday mascot is something I’ve entertained covering before; I’ve come across reports from people who claim they’ve met Santa. However, I’d rather save those stories for a year when I’m actively writing from the start of it and not the middle of the summer.

Still, this sounds like a whimsical time. So, come along; let’s go Easter Egg hunting. I call dibs on the eggs that have money!

Decemystery (2024) 18: One Man’s Conversation with a Cat

 

This write-up is dedicated to a very dear friend of mine. You know who you are!

Once upon a time, I was a bright-eyed, idealistic guy who had dreams and aspirations. Then, the tsunami called “life” came along and washed them all away. This is why I now vehemently dislike idealism and believe that people are better off learning early on that the world’s a rough place and viewed the same way you’d view a lion—terrifying.

Lucky for me, the one thing that the tsunami didn’t sweep away was my optimism. I’ve always maintained a fair amount of it, and I’ve made sure never to lose it. It’s an important piece of my younger self that I cling to for dear life.

That said, for a while, my optimism was really close to evaporating when it came to my writing. The reason for that? Well, when I looked at my family—be they immediate or extended—I often looked at myself and questioned what road I took a detour on.

For context, my family has a history in the military and law (be it law enforcement or lawyering). To call me a black sheep would be quite an understatement; I’m about as far detached from them when it comes to careers and jobs as you can get. Whereas they took up noble occupations, I’m sitting on my bed writing about how people saw a giant spider on the moon.

This, in turn, would make me feel vastly inferior to them. I suppose that’s a given; I’m writing about some of the weirdest stuff I find while combing the Internet. I’m not exactly Robert Kardashian, but I still wished I had more to show for my life than a blog that people visit on occasion.

Lucky for me, in recent times, I’ve come to embrace that black sheep status. My family has supported me, and they love that I’ve pursued a more niche and obtuse path in life than following in the footsteps of everyone else. So, all’s well and good.

Now, what does any of this have to do with today’s story? Well, as we draw ever closer to the end of Decemystery, I want the stories to get weirder; I want them to become so brain-meltingly absurd that you’ll take a look at the title and go, “Oh, Vertigo made this up.” But, deep down, you’ll know I didn’t.

I feel like if I’m going to embrace the topics I’ve fallen in love with, I need to make the second half of this month near-total chaos; I need this Decemystery to end off on a note so crazy that every day will be akin to the wildest roller coaster imaginable! So, to begin that, let’s talk about One Man’s Conversation with a Cat.

Decemystery (2024) 17: The 2023 Beverwijk Alien Abduction

 

When I was 13 years old, I remember going to see a movie. I can’t remember which, but I recall getting a trailer for a film called “The Fourth Kind,” starring Mila Jovovich (who was in those really schlocky Resident Evil movies). She played a psychologist named “Abigal Tyler,” whose patients all claim to see an owl—which I used as the header image for a write-up last year. This, of course, turns out to be incorrect; the “owl” is an extraterrestrial that abducts them.

While I can’t remember what movie I saw the trailer in front of, I recall it scaring me. Yet, I don’t know what caused me to be afraid. I think it was the eerie shot of the owl getting closer to the camera and slowly turning into a Grey alien. Either way, it ended up being seared into my mind. Thanks, Universal Pictures!

Anyway, I didn’t watch the film until 2018—nine years after it was released. As it turns out, film critics aren’t always wrong; sometimes, they hit the nail on the head. The movie wasn’t very good. It was boring, uninteresting, and wasn’t scary.

The movie also had a lot of editing choices that actively made watching the thing awkward, such as one instance where there are four separate shots going on at once: two reenactments and two “archived recordings.” If you don’t know what I’m talking about, go watch an episode of the show “24” and wait for an interlude where the clock is ticking and four scenes of different characters play out on the screen. The movie does that, and it’s horrifically executed.

Anyway, why did I bring this up today? Well, it’s because I’ve never been a believer in alien abductions—I said as much five days ago, and I’ve stated the same thing prior to that. Despite that belief, I find them to be one of the most interesting bits of UFO lore out there. That’s one of the reasons I wanted to watch The Fourth Kind in the first place. It’s also why I ended up watching “Dark Skies,” which you should watch if you want to watch a movie about alien abduction that doesn’t suck. Seriously, I was surprised since I thought the trailer was terrible.

I digress, though. As I was putting Decemystery 2024 back together, it occurred to me that I hadn’t covered a story about alien abduction since 2019—back when I covered the story of Alan Godfrey, a British police officer who claimed he was abducted by aliens. It’s a pretty baffling case that, to this day, I can’t make heads or tales of, and I need to rewrite it.

With the knowledge that I haven’t covered anything related to an alien abduction in half a decade on my mind, I decided that I’d make amends for that by covering not one but two stories related to it. Today’s the first one, and it’s a story dedicated to a Dutch friend of mine. If she happens to dislike this story, I’ll be almost as disappointed as I was when watching The Fourth Kind.

That said, I think it’s about high time we take a trip back to Europe to explore the realm of UFOs and aliens once more. Come along, dear reader; it’s time to examine the tale of The 2023 Beverwijk Alien Abduction.

Decemystery (2024) 16: bubbles.avi

 

Here’s a random fun fact for you, dear reader: This story’s the only one that’s both a “purge survivor” from the original schedule for this month and a part of the five entries I picked from the Conspiracy Iceberg. I thought that was kind of neat.

Anyway, hello, dear reader; welcome back to Decemystery 2024. We’ve hit the halfway point, and I wanted to write about something that was as fun as yesterday’s entry. That was ridiculously easy to do because this story’s been on my radar for a while; I believe it was a part of last year’s Decemystery duology, and I’d considered covering it in 2022. The third time’s the charm, I guess!

If you were to ask me why on God’s green Earth I picked this case out to cover over any other number of Conspiracy Iceberg entries, I wouldn’t be able to answer you. While it’s easier to understand when you hear the claims (yes, claims—there’s more than one version of this), the name doesn’t exactly sound that exhilarating. In fact, it sounds like a really cliché creepypasta—or a plot element to one.

Yet, surprisingly enough, that’s not the case. In fact, the more prevalent version of this conspiracy is beautiful—a word that I don’t think I’ve ever used to describe something without being the slightest bit sardonic. The same can’t be said for the other version, but I digress. Come along, dear reader; let’s take a look at bubbles.avi and see what it’s like when beauty meets brutality!

Decemystery (2024) 15: The Glowing Toe of North Dakota

 

I want to paint a picture for you, dear reader. One of melancholy, “what could have been,” and hopefulness.

After I finished last year’s Decemystery duology, I had three stories picked out for the start of this year. One of them has been on my to-do list since this blog began; I’d been searching high and low for it. I’ve written a portion of the article, but the majority remains incomplete, though I ended up using a section for “The McDonald’s Blob” write-up’s intro and My Take sections.

I never began the other two for two reasons. The first was that my bipolar exited remission. I started experiencing terrible mood swings, ranging from feelings of loneliness and hopelessness to believing that I was invincible.

For the most part, those contrasting emotions were active at the same time in what’s known as a “mixed episode.” For those who don’t know, a mixed episode is when you experience a manic/hypomanic episode and a depressive episode simultaneously. I have type 2 bipolar, so I have hypomania, which isn’t as severe as regular mania.

All of this started in January and didn’t end until mid-August. But, the not-so-ideal circumstances didn’t end there. At the end of the month, my grandmother passed away. She was my last surviving grandparent, and I found myself wishing I’d spent more time with her.

Then I got sick, which was salt in an already degloved-sized wound. If you didn’t know, I hate getting sick—a lot. I contracted some sort of cough while I was in New York for the funeral wake. It wasn’t COVID; that was saved until July.

Suffice it to say the start of my year was a grand disappointment. My plans didn’t come to fruition, my hopes to make 2024 an amazing year for this blog floundered, and I kept blaming myself for not being better in every possible way. I thoroughly believed that it was my fault nothing went right.

Now, as of this writing, I’ve accepted that that isn’t the case. While I could have (and should have) posted an update or two, I felt too ashamed at the time—especially when I couldn’t make any promises for this year’s Decemystery.

But not posting any updates is beside the point. No, the point is that I wanted to cover one of the three stories I planned to start 2024 with. I also wanted it to be one that’d remove the melancholy I’ve come to associate the start of this year with.

That task proved easy since the story I’d begun work on will most likely be the inaugural write-up for Decemystery 2025. Meanwhile, the second story will be covered at some point next year—if all goes well, anyway.

That left me with the third story, the one I’d planned to do at the end of January. It’s another Fortean Map Enigma, and it’s one that I considered covering last year. I forget what it was replaced with, but that’s unimportant. No, what is important is we’re going to retroactively make 2024 feel like a success story by covering a mystery that’s sure to leave you flabbergasted! Come along, dear reader, as we investigate the absolutely bonkers story of The Glowing Toe of North Dakota!

Decemystery (2024) 14: The Brisbane Gremlin

 

Have you ever had one of those days when you didn’t want to do something, but you knew you had to do it because if you didn’t do it, you’d feel like a sloth? That’s me as I type this. As of writing, I got done with the previous Decemystery entry, and a part of me wants to do little more than slack off by playing a Pokémon ROM hack. Maybe Renegade Platinum; I’d like to do a playthrough where none of my Pokémon faint.

Alas, not writing will make me feel irritated at myself for being lazy. As such, I must continue the grind; I need to write more. Some may say that it’s unhealthy to push myself to write when I want to take a break. I concur, but I have a secret weapon to get the best of both worlds. It’s called “making sure the upcoming stories are easy enough to write so I don’t stress myself out.” By doing this, I won’t exhaust myself, and I can also have the time of my life without worrying about overworking myself.

I attribute this tactical move to Douglas MacArthur, who I’m pretty sure once said something along the lines of, “Duty, honor, country, write about simple things to make life easy.” I’m pretty sure he said that before the infamous Battle of Time Constraints.

Anyway, now that you know my mindset for today’s write-up, let’s get down to business. While I may be in the mood to slack off, I’ve had my heart set on today’s story because it was one that I was really eager to cover from the get-go. Then, when I was reading it over, I realized something rather bizarre.

I’d picked out the wrong story.

Indeed, when I was making a Google Document of links for stories I’d cover, I’d mistakenly copied the wrong one (likely due to being half asleep since I often gather stories before I go to bed) and hyperlinked it. However, upon reviewing the story, I found that it was far more than adequate for this month.

As for the other story, I’m sure I’ll find it again one day. Who knows, maybe while writing about this mystery, I’ll have stumbled across it again and worked it into the schedule. It’s not like there have been several stories that I’ve already scrapped due to not feeling like writing about them.

I digress, though. Yesterday, I briefly mentioned sightings of children seeing gremlins. Today, we’ll be talking about one such incident. Come along, dear reader; it’s time for us to head to the Land Down Under and investigate the mystery of The Brisbane Gremlin!

Decemystery (2024) 13: The Mummy on the Bed

 

Ah, this story. There’s a weird history with it. It was on the schedule for last year’s Decemystery duology, but I scrapped it in favor of something else. I forget which story it was, but regardless, there was also the mounting pressure of having to write so much in so little time.

When this year rolled around, though, I didn’t plan on covering it. Then, when I revised the schedule, I did—until I didn’t. After the mammoth-sized write-ups “The Nickelodeon Hamster Wheel Broadcast” and “The Man From the Box,” the thought of covering a third mystery from Reddit sounded as appealing as salmonella. Simply put, I dreaded the idea of having another write-up that’d end up being far longer than I originally intended it to be—and that would leave me utterly drained.

However, after yesterday’s case, I opted to look over this story again out of sheer curiosity. As I did, I realized that it was nowhere close to as long as the aforementioned two. In fact, it’s remarkably short; it’s roughly the length of a story from About but with a few replies (only six, with half of them being from the original poster).

So, after much consideration (by which I mean I acted out of pure impulse), I figured I’d re-add it to Decemystery 2024’s schedule. In doing so, I’m confident that this story has had roughly the same number of date changes Duke Nukem Forever did prior to its release back in 2011. I promise it won’t be anywhere near as mediocre as that game was.

Anyway, aside from taking us back to Reddit, this case is also the first time since the original Decemystery that I’ll be discussing a story related to a mummy. Yes, it’s been six years since I’ve discussed anything related to them; I’m in disbelief that it’s taken me this long to talk about them. So, come along; let’s dive into the belly of one of the Internet’s most controversial websites once more and go over the oh-so-fantastically named story of The Mummy on the Bed!

Decemystery (2024) 12: The UFOs High Above Artjärvi!

 

In the past, I’ve talked about how much I love my friends. This love hasn’t changed while I’ve been absent from writing; if anything, my love for them has only grown because they’ve supported me through the numerous hardships I’ve endured. Likewise, I’ve done my best to help them out—even if it’s through simple gestures.

Writing articles dedicated to my friends is one of those simple gestures. While it may be a bit self-indulgent since I can’t guarantee it’ll make them happy, I do like to think that offering them something to read can help take their mind off of simple troubles, whether it be stress from college, work, or anything else of that nature. If nothing else, it’s the perfect reason for me to stop procrastinating!

Last year, a few of the Decemystery duology entries were dedicated to friends. One of them was for a Finnish friend of mine, Nea, whom I’m very close to. Initially, I wasn’t sure if I’d cover another one for her—or any other friends, for that matter. However, given the worry that she, along with my other friends, expressed during struggles I had earlier in the year with my bipolar, I figured it’d be rude of me not to do something for them.

So, when I was piecing this year’s Decemystery back together, I opted not only to dedicate another story to her but also picked out a few other cases that I knew would make my closest friends happy. Most of those friends are from one collective group, though, so the story dedicated to them will come much later in the month (much like last year).

Anyway, let’s get to today’s story. Well, if you read the title, you know what to expect. It’s time for more UFO goodness; I can’t help but have a sweet tooth for these stories. While some may be frustrating (like the one I went over the day before yesterday), so many of them provide me with a wonderful amount of material to work with…

And then there’s today’s story.

This is a head-scratcher of a case. I can’t quite put into words what it is, but this sounds like more than a UFO sighting without it ever becoming more than one. It’s practically one sentence away from being an alien abduction story—one that’s simultaneously told from the perspective of someone who witnessed an alien abduction and was abducted by aliens.

But, hey, don’t take my word for it; I’ll showcase it to you myself. Grab your passport, and let’s take a trip over to Finland, dear reader! It’s time to dive into the story of The UFOs High Above Artjärvi! Why’d I add an exclamation point to today’s write-up? Because I felt like it, that’s why!

Decemystery (2024) 11: The Durham Force Field

When it comes to Fortean mysteries—or any type of mystery, really—there’s something about ones that lack much, if any, information that makes me excited. It’s something I’ve come to love in the past couple of years; it sets off a fire inside me that causes my mind to wander.

Now, sure, I hate making an abundance of assumptions, but I do enjoy a good rabbit hole—especially when I’m one of the first people to go down it—if not the first person to do so. There’s a certain thrill to it if that makes sense. If it doesn’t, then perhaps I enjoy covering ridiculous stuff a bit too much.

Regardless of how I feel, there’s one place that best exemplifies this thrill, and that’s what’s known as the “Fortean Map.” If you’ve been visiting this blog since 2021 and haven’t stopped under the assumption that it’s dead, thanks to the content droughts that have plagued it ever since 2022, then you might be familiar with that name. If you aren’t, it’s a massive map that someone made; it’s filled with a plethora of mysteries from across the planet.

As it stands, I’ve visited it a total of four times: twice for Decemystery 2021 (where I wrote about “The Elevator Riddle” and “The Signal of Isla Han Samar”) and twice during last year’s Decemystery duology (where I covered “The Groves Kurt Incident” and “Terry Lopi’s Disappearing Barn”). This year will mark the fifth and sixth times I’ve visited it.

Now, each time I visited the map in the past, I’ve covered something that I now refer to as a “Fortean Map Enigma.” They’re stories that have little to nothing about them available on the Internet. In the previous four write-ups, I’ve labeled them as stories made up by the map’s creator for fun. Today, however, all of that’s about to change because there’s a new possibility at play, and it all but makes me want to go back to the previous four write-ups and reexamine them with a fine-toothed comb.

So, for our inaugural visit to the Fortean Map, we’re taking a trip across the Atlantic Ocean and going to good ol’ England—northern England, to be exact. It’s here where we’ll find something labeled The Durham Force Field. On its own, that name is fascinating and would pique my interest. However, the summary given makes border on irresistible. In fact, I considered writing about it last year. However, I believe I swapped it out with Terry Lopi’s case.

Ah, but I digress. Come along, dear reader. Let’s discuss another Fortean Map Enigma and find out how everything’s about to change with these cases!

Decemystery (2024) 10: The “Butterfly” UFO of Willow, Alaska

 

Here’s a fun fact for you, dear reader: I’ve never had a schedule for Decemystery that has remained the same from the moment I began work on the inaugural write-up to the capstone. The reason for that is because of that thing called “time constraints,” and maybe the desire to cover some other story because it intrigued me more than another one. ADHD will do that to you.

More often than not, it’s due to time constraints. When you’re consistently on the clock, sacrifices must be made, and that can lead to seeking out a shorter and simpler case to fill a slot. That’s what happened today—and I think it’s easy to see why if you read yesterday’s entry. The Man From the Box left me mentally fatigued, so I needed something that would be easier and would make me feel less stressed.

Boy, I wish I could say that today’s story provided that.

With something like the Man From the Box, the exhaustion came from how much there was to it and how disappointed in myself I was for not knowing what I believed were crucial details. I’m sure this disappointment will remain when these write-ups go up, and I’m still working on the tail-end of Decemystery 2024 (unless I get really lucky and manage to finish it before December 10). Regardless, the exhaustion I felt originated from my own shortcomings as a person; those shortcomings are something I can overcome, though. I hope to do so when 2025 rolls around.

In the case of today’s Decemystery entry, the exhaustion and stress were brought about by something much more comical. Every now and then, there are stories I find that make me feel like I’m trying to decipher ancient texts or I’m piecing together a jigsaw puzzle. In other words, the grammar or punctuation (or both) are terrible.

That’s the case with today’s story.

Some may ask why I’d bother writing about a story that stresses me out. Well, this one’s special. It’s not only a peculiar UFO story; it’s one that I was able to make sense of somewhat easily. It also has a plethora of baffling details that I believe will make for a fun read and will allow me to have far more fun than I did with yesterday’s story. So pack your bags, dear reader, because we’re headed to America’s Last Frontier! This is the story of The “Butterfly” UFO of Willow, Alaska!

Decemystery (2024) 9: The Man From the Box

 

So, here’s a fun little story for you. Today’s write-up was set to be a part of Decemystery 2022 before all of that fun stuff with brain fog happened. I then had it lined up for last year’s duology and got very close to beginning work on it. However, if memory serves, I figured it’d be way too much work, so I decided to forego it.

Now, it’s October. I’ve been slowly progressing through these write-ups—by which I mean that I still have 24 of them to go (counting this one). I’m looking at my schedule and notice that today’s story is one of the five “purge survivors.” If you don’t know what those are, I scrapped Decemystery 2024’s original schedule, though five stories survived. Why did that happen?

Brain fog. Again.

Anyway, seeing this story’s name made me wince a bit. The momentum I’d built up from the previous two write-ups was something I’d hoped I could hold onto; they were brisk and easy to cover. This one’s almost certainly not going to be either of those things due to the websites we’ll be visiting.

For a brief moment, as I sat on my bed, I considered delaying this story for the third year in a row. Not only would it save me a lot of time, but it would take some stress off my back. However, I knew if I did that, it would only prolong the inevitable (which would be a full-blown delay into next year). So, ultimately, I opted against that. I didn’t want this to become another version of Julia or Shades of Death Road (both of which have been on my to-do list since 2019).

However, that’s not the only reason I didn’t want to push this story into next year. Personally, I believe this to be one of the strangest and creepiest supposed firsthand accounts with the Fortean one can find online. So, I think it’s about time we finally look over the story of The Man From the Box. Come along, dear reader; let’s take a look at a case that’s been collecting dust in the recesses of my archive of mysteries!

Decemystery (2024) 8: The McDonald's Blob

 

When I started this blog, I had zero intention of covering unsolved mysteries. Absolutely none. That was a spur-of-the-moment thing I did for reasons I don’t even remember. The inaugural Decemystery back in 2018 was something I vaguely recall doing for the heck of it; the exact reasoning is now in and of itself a mystery. If I did mention it at any point, it’s been lost amidst the sea of other stories I’ve covered—and I dislike the original Decemystery because of its poor quality.

This impromptu decision to write about a mystery a day eventually led me to slowly but surely amass a backlog of over 5,000 mysteries I’d like to cover. I’m unsure if I’ll write about them on this blog. It’s more likely that I’ll write a series of books where I cover them, but that’s a story for another time in the far distant future. For now, let’s get back on track.

While I have fleeting memories of Decemystery 2018, most of them are of no importance and amount to little more than me typing away haphazardly without much thought about what I was doing. I believe there were a few times I considered abandoning the project, but I thought that wasn’t worth it. Besides, I thought it’d be cool if I completed it—and I did!

That said, while I view the quality as poor nowadays, I recall wanting to do Decemystery again in 2019. Except, then I didn’t; I canceled it. Then, like an indecisive buffoon, I uncanceled it.

Once again, I can’t remember the events that led to the cancellation because I deleted the blog post. I’m sure there was some reason related to mental health or time constraints, but it matters not because I managed to complete it without missing a day.

That brings me to the point of this retrospective intro. Whenever I reflect upon the evolution of this blog, there’s something that stands out to me—namely, the aforementioned Decemystery 2019.

Indeed, the Decemystery that nearly got thrown out the window is arguably the most pivotal moment in the blog’s history. Why? Well, it was the Decemystery where I opted to broaden the stories I covered. I didn’t stick to normal unsolved mysteries; I began including entries from the “Conspiracy Iceberg,” an iceberg chart that has a plethora of conspiracy theories on it.

This can be seen right out of the gate. The inaugural entry of Decemystery 2019 was “Golf Rumors,” a popular Conspiracy Iceberg entry that has more variants than I care to count. I also went over four other stories that month: Cameraheads (which has since been solved as it was a piece of lost media), The Patterson-Gimlin Massacre (which I want to rewrite), “Is Lord of the Rings Based on a True Story?” (again, I want to rewrite that one), and Project Blue Beam.

Adding on to that, I also covered the 2006 Volleyball Incident, which I’m pretty sure was going to be a part of Decemystery 2019 but was nixed for reasons that elude me. Look, it’s been five years, and I don’t have a journal. I’m sorry.

So, what does all of this have to do with today? Well, I wanted to make Decemystery 2024 special. I’ve had an arduous year, and I didn’t want to keep going through the archives of About like I didn’t care anymore. So, I figured I’d go through the two Megalists I wrote and find five of the weirdest conspiracy theories to cover.

And boy, oh boy, I succeeded. Believe me when I say that I looked for the weirdest stories; I made sure that they made the five cases we discussed last year look like child’s play.

So, with all of that in mind, I say it’s time that we celebrate not only the wonderful month of December but also celebrate the evolution of this blog throughout the years. And it all begins with the wonderfully weird story of The McDonald’s Blob! Come along, dear reader; let’s see what lurks in the shadows of those iconic golden arches!

Decemystery (2024) 7: The Purple Monster

 

I want to paint a picture for you, dear reader. I want you to imagine that you do what I do; you write about the weird stories you’ve read online, in books, and heard in various videos you’ve listened to throughout your life. You’ve amassed a library’s worth of the craziest stories that anyone can imagine—their validity notwithstanding.

Now, I want you to imagine that you’re talking to a friend—any friend will do—and you get on the topic of your writing. You decide to tell them about how you’ve found a few odd stories that you’re considering covering and that one of them, in particular, is really peculiar. This prompts your friend to ask you, “What’s the weirdest story you’ve ever read?”

For most, this would be a very simple question to answer. Heck, for some people who even know more—and I use this word incredibly loosely—“obscure” cases like the Isdal Woman, you could name at least a few contenders for that title.

Personally, that question is impossible to answer. It seems like each year, there’s a new candidate who challenges something like the Oviedo Dick Monster for the dubious honor of “Weirdest Story I’ve Ever Read.” And if you’re wondering, that case is most likely the case I’d label as the strangest I’ve ever read.

However, I can’t say with absolute certainty because today’s Decemystery entry is a masterpiece in oddness. Is it as weird as that phallic-shaped monstrosity from Florida? No, definitely not. But that doesn’t minimize just how strange it is—not by a long shot. So come along, dear reader; it’s time to delve into the archives of About yet again as we take a look at the story of The Purple Monster!

Decemystery (2024) 6: The Skinless, Yellow-Eyed Creature of Arizona

 

If there’s one thing I enjoy, it’s a good scary story—be it short or long. I’ve said that before, and I will repeat it as many times as I can because it’s the unvarnished truth. Horror has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember; I attribute it to reading the Goosebumps books as a child; the delightfully creepy tales that R.L. Stine weaved were among my favorites. Heck, I still have fond memories of them. I always have, and dang it, I always will!

My friends, on the other hand, are generally not as keen on the genre. Some of them are, but more than a few have told me that some of the cases I’ve covered creep them out. I don’t see what the big deal is. How can you not enjoy stories of people seeing monstrosities that, if proven to exist, would reshape what we know about Earth?

Okay, perhaps that’s a bad question to ask, especially when we’re discussing my friends, who you likely know nothing about. What I can safely say, though, is that today’s Decemystery entry is one that’s as creepy as it is absolutely bewildering. In other words, it’s the norm for this blog. If you expect anything to be normal, you made a wrong turn on Google, Bing, DuckDuckGo, or whatever search engine you use.

As for the story itself, it comes to us from archives of About—the website that I’m sure I’ll give its own tag because of how frequently I visit it. Actually, that doesn’t sound like a bad idea. Maybe I’ll do that at some point after I’ve finished this year’s Decemystery (assuming I remember to do it).

Anyway, let’s get to the story. Suffice it to say, the thing that caught my eye was the name, and I have to imagine that you, dear reader, also saw that title and either went, “I’m not reading that,” or “Oh, I’m so reading that.” If you fall into the latter category, then come along; it’s time to head to the American Southwest to investigate the case of The Skinless, Yellow-Eyed Creature of Arizona!

Decemystery (2024) 5: The Triangle Man

 

When it comes to the realm of the paranormal, I’m far from the most well-educated person on Earth. Sure, I’ve heard plenty of ghost stories. I know the basics of ghost lore—to some degree, anyway. I know that ghosts aren’t corporeal beings, that they leave behind cold spots, and that they can move stuff. Also, they’re prone to responding to people knocking on walls. I have no idea why, but I think that’s funny.

I learned the basics of ghosts as a child, though, and I’ve since forgotten a lot of other things that would likely be useful when writing about them. I could go back and relearn them, but I’m lazy. Yes, that’s really my excuse. How professional of me.

In recent years, my interest in it has waned considerably. While I still enjoy a good ghost story, I feel like they’re largely the same. A house or some other location where stuff moves around and footsteps are heard when there’s only one person home. If you’re lucky, the person saw an apparition.

That level of sameness makes them a drag to cover. There’s only so much I can handle before I find the energy and love that I pour into writing turning into a sense of obligation. That, for me, is one of the worst feelings in the world because it leads to the driest and blandest write-ups possible. The last thing I want to do is post something that was an obligation and not something that I believe could be enjoyed by the folks who visit this blog.

Those reasons are why I seldom cover paranormal cases. While some can argue that UFO sightings are the same, I find UFOs to be a lot more interesting. Also, there’s a lot more fun to be had in the absurdity of cases about enormous UFOs being seen by one person. To paraphrase CinemaSins, “Nobody who watches the sky for a living saw this thing.”

That said, there are occasionally cases that pique my interest enough to where I need to make an exception. Today marks one of those occasions because it is, without a doubt, one of the most unsettling ghost stories I’ve read in a long time. I mentioned it in yesterday’s Decemystery entry, and I’m going to give it the attention it demands today. This, dear reader, is the disturbing tale of The Triangle Man!

Decemystery (2024) 4: The Triangle Creature

 

If there’s one thing I love about the realm of cryptozoology, it’s that there’s no shortage of weird and inexplicable tales for me to read about. For every relatively normal creature like Bigfoot, there’s a Bagodemon waiting to give me an aneurysm just around the corner.

No, I haven’t recovered from that case a year later.

Anyway, while that metaphorical aneurysm sure as heck drives me nuts at times, I still relish the chaotic nature of cryptozoology and its many oddities. To me, it’s like a comfort zone. I can always count on it to bring me a sense of solace and provide me with something to write about (even if the story is absolute nonsense). So, today, I feel like harkening back to a more classic tale of strangeness.

Today’s story is one that I had intended to cover for one of the Decemysterys last year (I forget which). The exact reason I nixed it also evades me, but I think it’s because I figured I’d be treading similar ground, and I didn’t want to have another write-up that would read like so many others. Funny, I could say the same thing about the numerous UFO stories I covered.

Because it ended up getting nixed, it ended up being a part of Decemystery 2024’s original schedule. Now, if you read the intro to the Nickelodeon Hamster Wheel Broadcast write-up, you may remember that I mentioned that five stories survived the “purge” of that original schedule. I also said that when one of those stories came up, I would mention that. Well, surprise-surprise, this happens to be one of them.

This case is known as The Triangle Creature. Why did it survive? Well, look at that name! How could I not keep it around? Now, enough talk. Come along, dear reader; it’s time for us to head to the Heartland of the United States to discuss one of the greatest-named cryptids out there!